Are you a witch and other silly questions...
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Are you a witch and other silly questions...

And so ends my second year as an invitee to Cal Expo's California Authors Booth.
It was an interesting season this year, filled with more unique patrons, fascinating contacts and some of the most interesting questions yet. Here are the best:
1. While picking up a copy of The Brotherhood:
          a)"Is this about the Nazi's?"
          b)"Is this about the KKK?"
          c)"Is this about a cult?"
          d)"Is this a Secular novel?"
There are things I say in my head and things I say out loud, hopefully in these instances they are not the same. Initially, my head said, "Really? Are you f'in kidding me?" But, luckily, when I opened my mouth, my Mother came out and politely said, "No. It is not."
2. "Are you authorized?" - (I'll let you ponder that one awhile. I myself am still a little puzzled by that one.)
3. "What do you think of the new immigration proposal?" - Okay, I have olive skin and dark hair with a Latin last name, I get it...but, REALLY? Dude, we're at the State Fair, and I am like, ya know...selling my  urban-paranormal fantasy novels. I am not here to discuss the long range effects on early childhood development of Latino children in the low-income and unincorporated areas of the Nation. I am, however, highly concerned with the deep-fried Pineapple Upside Down  cake you are spitting all over my book display during your tirade!
4. "How do you win this?" - Baffled by this completely when the little girl asked. She was referring to the rubber bracelets I had displayed on the first day which were embossed with my website address. Staring blindly at me for an answer, my sister Candy reminded me that the fair sponsors have games you play to win the free items (bags, pens, Frisbees, etc). Candy leaned over my shoulder and said, "It's free." Cautiously, the girl took her prize and walked away.
And last but not least, and always my repeat favorite...
5. "Are you a witch?" - All right, folks, for the last time this year, "No. I am not." I know a few. I've interviewed a few for research, and am honored to call many of them my friends. I've studied their craft for my books, and collected a few of their tools for a visual description. But, as for the practice and application of the beliefs, the craft and the way of life, no, I am not, and neither are my family. But should you ever hurt me and mine, or piss me off...I am only a telepathic thought (and or phone call) away from you being covered with oozing boils, and bald.
As much as I remember the oddities, I remember fondly a few others who came along...Steve the fireman, "Enjoy the book, and don't forget to check out the recipes!" Lizah, "I hope you feel better soon!" Danita, "It was great meeting you!" Naida,"Thank you for giving me a chance. I'll miss you." Shelly and Margaret, "You guys rock. I will definitely be in touch soon!" Sarita,"Remember, listen to your heart and don't give up!" and to Brenda Novak, "I want to grow up and be just like you someday!"

1 Comment to Are you a witch and other silly questions...:

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Poppy on Thursday, September 12, 2013 12:33 AM
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